LA's Burl-expert

As we all know, burlesque is very much a DIY community.  Part of what draws some of us to burlesque as an art form is ability to play dress up, to make a costume more than the once a year Halloween party or Ren-Faire or Zombie Prom.  I firmly believe that all dancers should have a basic knowledge of how to add simple embellishments to a bra and panty set, so that you can hit the stage in something that goes beyond off-the-rack (literally).  But there are certain times when you are going to want a garment that goes beyond your skill set.  A perfect example is although I have 20 years costuming experience, I do not have the couture and tailoring skills to build corsets or jackets.  And because of my build, what Sir MixALot refers to as his dream girl, I do need to have a few bespoke items.  That, and you just never see opera coats on the rack at Nordstroms. 

So, as someone who’s sat on both sides of the aisle of costume design, as client and designer, I’d like to offer a few pieces of advice so that you and your designer can nurture a relationship that will not only keep you both happy, but will produce some amazing acts.

REFERRALS
Since this will not only be you time/money/performance on the line, do your research.  Look at their portfolio or pictures of things they designed.  If their online book is a series of corsets and bias-cut gowns, then maybe they are not the person to build your light-up post-apocalyptic body armor.  Also, ask other performers who have worked with the designer if they were happy with the work done.  Was it well-crafted, did it arrive in time to rehearse for the gig? Finding the right designer is like finding the right gynecologist. 

I also recommend working with designers that have a burlesque background, or theatrical background, as both of these kinds of designers understand the quick change of getting out of your costume.

FIT
I once asked Venus deMille, whose various jobs besides burlesque performer includes designing for the Ovation-award winning theatrical troupe the Troubadours as well as being a head tailor at the LA Opera, how can you get sizes over the phone and make a garment that fits perfectly without having a fitting?  Her response “You can’t.  You can get close, but it’s never going to fit perfectly.”  So when you are shopping for a designer, look for someone close to home so you can have a proper fitting.  If you want to work with a specific designer not within driving distance, there’s a couple things you can do:

1. Get measured by a local designer.  You’re going to need to provide more than just bust, waist, hips.  I have needed such measurements as the underbust, base of the neck to waist, and the outseam in the shoes the performer was going to wear with the act. 
2. Skype your measurements.  Have the designer on the other side of the web cam as a friend measures you.  This way the designer can coax a pal through the proper way to measure.  (For example, your natural waist is NOT where you wear your jeans, but the smallest part of your torso.)
3. Send your measurements ahead, then set a date for a fitting and book a gig at the same time!  This way the designer can either make a mock-up (the garment in a cheap fabric, strictly for fittings) or get a head start on the garment.  You come into town, get fitted, and then to help pay for the travel, get booked on a local burlesque show. 
4. Provide a base garment that fits. If you are looking to have embellishments done to an existing garment, send the garment along with a picture of you wearing it.  Whether something “fits” can be subjective.  (Look at how many women wear the wrong bra size!)  Also, this allows the designer to see if the garment truly fits as is, it may need extra fabric to allow for the addition of zippers (which automatically subtracts at least a 1/2 inch on either side for seam allowance).
5. Have 2 designers:  Currently I am working with Ray Gunn on a costume.  Here’s the rub:  He’s in Saint Louis and I’m in LA.  He has a local designer standing by to make minor adjustments to both the fit and the logistics of the costume.  Any changes made to the costume have to be run by me first, as ultimately my name will go on it, but this takes the pressure off of mailing a garment back and forth (and upping the chance of loosing it in the mail.) 

BUDGET
When I do custom work, I like to ask upfront what people have in their budget.  Then I can determine what kind of embellishments I will be using.  A $100 bra and panty set says I will be mixing Swarovski and acrylic rhinestones, using decorators fringe over handed-beaded Egyptian fringe.  Also, when thinking of your budget, remember that at least 50% of that budget is going to labor, not just materials.  A designer needs to get paid for their time, and that time can include designing/sketches/research, time to shop for materials, time to sew the garment.

I highly recommend that you have the full amount of your budget set aside for your custom work.  You do not want to not get your costume because you had to spend your money on the gas bill, and neither does your designer.  And be prepared to pay a 50% deposit to any designer upon commencement with the job.  I offer people 2 pricing plans:  we can work with a flat rate, where you give me the garment that fits, some pictures of inspiration, I do a rough sketch and make the garment; or we can do hourly, where I provide pictures or swatches of all materials, trims, test garments for your approval. 

You can ask a designer to see how their budget breaks down (is it reasonable for the designer to spend 4 hours on research?) as well as the designer to keep all the related receipts (some materials can not be returned).  You should be aware that any budget has a research and development factor—like purchasing a few kinds of boning to see which one works best with the costume. 

If you do not have the full budget upfront, talk to the designer about payment plans.  I’ve done plans where as each payment came through I worked on each new piece.  I’ve also left room on a garment where the client only had $100 to put towards a costume, so we built a design that the embellishments could be adding as they client saved more money.  For example, maybe only using 2 gross of size 30 rhinestones on a bra, and then later adding another 6 gross of rhinestones, or only having one layer of fringe and being able to add on more layers with more money.  If the designer is local, see if they would be willing to trade time-for-couture.  You may not be able to help them sew, but you may be able to run some errands, do some administrative work for them, or clean their studio.

DEADLINES
You are going to want to have your garment with plenty of time to rehearse in it.  But you may want it sooner than 2 weeks prior to the show, as we all know that our choreography and costume is a snake biting it’s own tail:  We imagine the skirt is going to come off like so, but once we dance with it, we realize it needs to be snaps not a zipper.  Ideally, you should give yourself 6 weeks prior to a show to work out any kinks, especially if you are working with an out-of-town designer, as you’ll need to factor in shipping time. 

Another consideration, designers aren’t just sitting around waiting for you to call them.  They may have a few clients they are servicing (not to mention may also be performers themselves and have their own costumes to make).  For example, as of this post in early May, if you called me for a costume due in early June, I would have to turn you away, as I have no less than a dozen costumes to make, all due in and around the Burlesque Hall of Fame (my own included). 

HONESTY
I can stress this enough.  Be honest.  You want a bra and panty set and only have $50?  Tell the designer.  You want it by next week?  Tell the designer.  You’re not happy with the appliqués on the costume.  Tell the designer.  There may be financial concerns like you have to pay a rush fee, or add more to the budget to get new appliqués, but no designer wants to send a costume out in the world that doesn’t work.  We would rather have our designs up on the stage. 

TEST RUNS
Before you fork over a couple hundred dollars, nay thousands, to a new designer, order a smaller/cheaper custom item.  This way, you can test drive if you like their craftsmanship, did the deliver on time, were they easy to work with?  Get something in the same realm as the bigger costume you want to order though; don’t order a fascinator if you are looking to have a gown made—perhaps have a dressing gown constructed to test their skills with the fit and their mastery with the materials. 

COMPLETED WORK
Be sure that your designer gives you any leftover scrap, trim, beads, etc. Ultimately, you paid for them and you will need them in case of embellishing other garments to match (like making matching pasties) or for repairs.  If you want to keep you patterns, that should be discussed before any work commences.  Some designers look at the patterns they made you as their intellectual property, some look at it as work-for-hire and that the designs are exclusive to the client.  If you are looking to hold an exclusive design, discuss that ahead of time.  Certain patterns may be common to that designer and thus unable to be exclusive to you, and if you want an exclusive, you may have to pay extra as the designer will not be able to use the effort in drafting a new pattern as something the can resell. 

The best thank you to a designer whose work you love, is to send them pictures of you in the costume.  Snapshots are fine, but if you can wear that costume in a photo shoot, and get permission from the photographer to use the photos for the designer’s own book and promotional materials, you will valued forever.

COMPLAINTS
If you are unhappy about the work, give the designer a chance to fix it.  For example, with my hand beaded tassels I make for my pasties, I know that they will shred over time.  Just how it is—those things take a beating!  I just tell anyone who purchases them that as long as they can find me, I can repair or replace.  If you are unsatisfied with the designer, simply part ways. 

This has been a long-standing issue with me and certain performers in the belly dance community who continue, in this day and age, to look their nose down on my art form.

At first, I thought the reason some of them judged burlesque unfairly was that they had seen some 2^nd rate burlesque.  Because neo-burlesque is still a relatively new form of live entertainment (compared to live music, theater, stand-up), I find that if an audience member sees one bad burlesque show, they may not see another, thinking the poor quality is indicative of the whole genre. 

But then someone explained to me that certain belly dancers wanted to distant themselves from us; that, heaven forbid, they should be confused with “strippers”.

A little history lesson:  in 1893, promoter Sol Bloome brought a group of Middle Eastern dancers to the Chicago World’s Fair. Please keep in mind, we are talking of a time of corsets, long skirts, and high necklines.  So although these dancers wore long skirts over pantaloons, and long tunics under vests, it was their freedom of movement—their undulations, their hip circles—caused such a scandal*.  Soon, copycat performers began springing up across the country claiming to be the original “Little Egypt” with a bastardization of the danse du ventre, and that eventually mixed with movement from the minstrel circuit and popular social dances.  Up and down hip movement became bumps, hip circles and umis became grinds.  It is also worth noting that the full coverage costume of the original Middle Eastern dancers became replaced with a stylized theatrical costume of bra and shimmy belt, as Orientalism was influencing fashion, literature and film.  Belly dance was fast becoming the hootchie-cootchie, featured in carnivals and vaudeville and finally the leap to burlesque.

As you can see, the progression of American belly dance and burlesque are linked hand in hand.  Both feature movement that uses of sensuality, moving one’s body in slow, snakelike movements or punctuated hits that accent erogenous zones like the hips or bust.  Both were considered exotic forms of entertainment, somewhat marginalized for their sexuality.  Both were predominantly performed in “low” venues (like carnivals and restaurants) versus “high” venues (like theaters).  At their core, both featured strong women that struggled with sexism and the rumors of prostitution, or at least being called whores.   Today, we also share silhouettes in costumes (bra, shimmy belts, panel skirts), fabulous eye make-up, use of body glitter, finding venues that respect dancers (with dressing rooms, stages without holes, proper lighting) and that every day we fight the same fight: that we deserve the same respect of any working woman, despite the misconceptions of our professions.

But it seems in that some—emphasis some—of our sisters in dance have turned their backs on us. Because they have fought long and hard to not be confused with strippers and prostitutes, they are afraid that by associating with us, we shall drag them down in our—what?  Filth?  Low morals? 

Another quick history lesson:  Burlesque and stripping share the same roots.  Burlesque, which started as “leg shows” with the performers wearing flesh colored tights (thus looking bare legged) in the late 1800’s, transitions to striptease, having women remove their gowns and teasing the audience with pasties and g-strings.  As the times progressed, topless go-go dancers became the rage in the free-spirited 60’s, to full nude in the 70’s, to pole dancing and lap dancing in the 80’s and 90’s.  Burlesque transformed into modern day stripping, and neo-burlesque was born of that tradition, mixed with drag and performance art.  But at the root of both is stripping. 

I can’t speak for every burlesque dancer, but I can say that I DO NOT tolerate anyone bad mouthing strippers.  These are our dance sisters as much as any other woman dancer.  We may spend more on our costumes, we may make less money, the audience’s expectations may vary (an audience at a strip club is quite introverted and predominantly male versus an audience at a burlesque show, which is vocal and comprised of almost as many women as men), but our intentions—to take our clothes off for the paying public—is the same.  When a newbie performer says that they did not like a burlesque act because it was “too strippery”, I often find upon further questioning that they thought the act was dull.  I can tell you that I have seen both boring burlesque and some very exciting stripping, and none of it had anything to do with whether or not you show the audience your taint, or how many rhinestones are on your bra. Many fabulous burlesque dancers have come from stripping, Jo Wheldon and Dita Von Teese to name a few.

So why do certain members of the belly dance community, some who would even call themselves feminists, continue this same-sex sexism?  My husband, David Avallone, who spent a good part of two years in the adult entertainment industry directing striptease and girl-on-girl videos for the internet firm Danni’s Hard Drive**, sums it up this way “Strippers and porn stars are the last unprotected minority in the country.  Any shitty generalization about them is fair game.”  They have seen far too many movies, episodes of Jerry Springer, that categorize strippers, or anyone who takes off their clothes in public, as rape victims, women with daddy issues, perverts, golddiggers, and less-than-talented dancers. I have often found that the people most offended by the idea of strippers and strip clubs have never even been in one.

I have also found that much of the same-sex sexism I have encountered, not just with belly dancers but with women in general, has been related to a certain amount of body shame.  That burlesque’s confidence with itself, with its love of all body types, with its own comfort at being partially clothed (or, in some people’s eyes, fully naked even though we are wearing fishnets, fringe, g-strings, pasties and boas), reinforces other’s people own shame about their bodies.  And no one wants to be reminded of their own shame.

Now, I have been lucky enough to be friends with many belly dance/burlesque crossover performers, including my mentor, hero and BFF, Princess Farhana.  I met Farhana through my involvement with the Velvet Hammer Burlesque.   Because of her, it never occurred me that any moderne woman, especially another dancer, would take issue with burlesque dancers.   Wasn’t it obvious that all women use their bodies and sexuality in the forum of dance?  Is there a difference between a naked Martha-Graham-style modern dancer, a belly dancer in a bra that pushes up her breasts, a Rockette in fishnets, a topless Las Vegas showgirl, a samba dancer in a thong, a pole dancer in a neon bikini, or a burlesque dancer in pasties?  I have seen some try and hide behind the guise of cultural purity, that belly dance must adhere to Middle Eastern standards.  And I would agree with them if we were talking about performing in the Middle East.  But we are talking about living and dancing in the United States, where any idea of propriety is self constructed in this land of anything goes.

I have hosted a many a workshop in showgirl-related arts like costuming and make-up, and I wonder how many belly dancers have not come to a class because it was hosted by a burlesque school?  Couldn’t we all share information on the best way to use costuming to camouflage our bodies, or how to apply false eyelashes?  Or the best techniques in moving our hips?  Would they feel the same prejudice against a class hosted by a samba instructor? 

After all, aren’t we all sisters under the beaded fringe? 

* LOOKING FOR LITTLE EGYPT by Donna Carlton

** Danni’s Hard Drive was owned by Danni Ashe, a former featured stripper who was twice arrested in clubs that had lied about the amount of skin she could show.  She posted a naked picture of herself on a use-net news group and became one of the most downloaded woman in history.  She is the only woman to be featured on the cover of both Juggs and The Wall Street Journal.

1.  UNDERWEAR IS NOT A COSTUME: Never has been, never will be.  But it’s a good place to start. 

2.  FIT:  Make sure your costume fits not only your body—if your garment is too  loose, you will look like you are wearing something from your mama’s cloest; too tight and the garment will pinch your body and make bulges.  Also take in consideration that you will have many beaded/embellished layers.  If you are buying a gown, you may want to buy a size up to accommodate the beaded undergarments underneath, then have the garment fitted over your burlesque bra.

3. CAMOUFLAGE: There are plenty of ways to hide the things we don’t like about our bodies and still keep a level of glamour.  Start with good dance posture (standing up straight, tits out, shoulders back and down, chin lifted, pelvis slightly tucked) then use the following:  upper arms (gloves/gauntlets/armbands), sagging breasts (push-up bras or demi-bras), tummy (underbust corset), booty (fishnets), upper thighs (long fringe or panels), cankles (boots). 

4. PIECES:   Burlesque costumes should not contain more than 3 layers:  outer costume (gown, pants and shirt, character costume), bra and shimmy belt or over-panties, and pasties and g-string or bottoms.  Too many costume pieces make it look like you are trying to hide your body and/or don’t have enough choreography for your act.

5. COLOR:  Using a bright or unusual color will bring attention to you onstage before even adding any embelishment.  Using colors opposite each other on the color wheel (blue/orange, red/green) will pop on stage.  Be sure to try different color combinations (like pink, turquoise and yellow)  Play around with paint chips from the hardware store for new color combinations.

6. TEXTURE:  You can create texture when using a monchrome by using other variations of the color (kelly green, olive, turquoise), or by mixing in highlights of a completely different color (using dark blues on a black costume).  These subtleties will give the garment an added boost.  You can also use different materials of one color, like mixing fur, sequins, feathers and spandex.

7. BLING: “Bling” is the ability to reflect light back into the audience.  Not all costumes require it (if you are building a character or period accurate costume).  Your costume should become more sumptuous the further down you go, embellished bra and belt, then rhinestone encrusted pasties and g-string. 

8. NEGATIVE SPACE: is the concept of leaving a ‘blank’ area so whatever embellishments you are using are in contrast to the empty or negative spaces on the garment will pop more.

9. EXAGGERATION:  When it comes to the stage, remember the bigger the better in terms of what the audience can see from the back row. For example, if you are using ‘punchline’ pasties, you may have to wear ones bigger than normal so everyone can see them, or making props 3x their normal size.

10. SEW EVERYTHING YOU CAN, GLUE ONLY SMALL EMBELLISHMENTS, AND NEVER HOT GLUE ANYTHING BUT PROPS OR HEADDRESSES:  Why?  I have seen hand-sewn garments that have lasted literally 300 years, and now think of that Halloween costume you hot-glued that didn’t even survive the night… Plus, if you sew on appliqués, fringe you can pull the stitches and repurpose an expensive piece of trim.

11. BUDGET:  If you are working on a budget, you want to put the shiniest embellishments on the part of your costume closest to your face and/or the costume piece you have on the longest for your act.   In most cases, this is your bra and belt.  If you are working with a limited amount of something, like rhinestones, be sure to section them so that you have an equal amounts with which to work.  If I have a gross of rhinestones (144), I will save 72 for the belt and 72 for the bra, with 36 for each side of the bra.

12. YOU PAY FOR IT EITHER WAY:  You can buy sequin/beaded fabric at $40 a yard and make a shimmy belt in an hour, or buy plain fabric at $5 a yard, and cover it with embellishments that will take an extra 10 hours to embellish.  So it comes down to what is your time worth. Do you “pay” yourself $10 an hour to make a costume?  $5?  Nothing?

13. MIX AND MATCH:  Few have the kind of money and/or storage for multiple costumes/characters, but you can play mix and match amongst core pieces.  I recommend starting with the following four colors, to mix and match for different looks.  Black:  goes with everything, and almost everyone will have a black costume to wear for group acts.  Nude/Metallic: a classic neutral and goes with anything and everything.  Red:  can be worn for Valentines, Halloween and Christmas, depending on accessories and hats/headdresses.  Your Favorite Color:  because it’s Your Favorite Color.  

14. SAVE SOME MATERIALS FOR REPAIRS AND ADDITIONS:  Keep a baggie for leftover trim for repairs, or if you want to add pieces like custom gloves, or a fascinator. 

15. AND FOR THE LOVE OF ALL THAT’S HOLY: CUT THE DAMN TAGS OUT OF YOUR COSTUME! Nuff’ said?

This comes in part from several conversations I’ve had with dancers who have realized, at some point while creating at new act, that someone else is already doing it.  Maybe not doing it exactly—maybe the other person is using the same song, or the same theme, or the same character.  What do you do if you find out that your act—maybe just a note scribbled in your journal, maybe performed once—is being performed elsewhere.

Let’s start with the concept of Zeitgeist, defined as “the general cultural, intellectual, ethical, spiritual, or political climate within a nation or even specific groups, along with the general ambiance, morals, sociocultural direction, and mood associated with an era.”  Think of acts based on current events, be they political, social or media based.  Some ideas are more in tune with the aesthetic of burlesque (movies, TVshows, etc.) than others (political causes), simply because they are easier to work with considering the tools of our medium (costume, dance, glamour, sex).  For example, I have seen no less than 3 Marie Antoinette style acts to “Rock Me Amadeus”, made from people who had zero contact with each other.  Some things just seem obvious upon hindsight.

We also often deal with Archetypes (universally identified figures like AntI-Hero, Damsel-In-Distress, etc.) and more in the specific, other Characters, be they fictional or historical.  In terms of Archetypes, think Naughty Nurse, Witch, 50’s Housewife.  How many acts do you think “Put Some Sugar In My Bowl” involve baking?  I have discovered that based on certain age/gender/races, there are characters we are drawn to over others—Cinderella, Bride of Frankenstein, Clyde Barrow, Josephine Baker, Madonna—to name a few.  I won’t get into cultural appropriation in this post, but as you might guess, white gals are not going to do Josephine Baker.  As a gal with Goth tendencies, I was naturally drawn The Bride.  I was also not shocked to find other people doing that act in other parts of the country since she is a character pervasive in pop culture.  I can tell you that before I debuted my Bride, I was made aware that the Flying Fox had a Bride of Frankenstein act.  Although I didn’t see her act, I was told it was traditional—black wig with a white stripe, the white robes and bandages.  Now, I knew my Bride was going to be different for several reasons:  My color scheme was green with red (including a green win with red stripe), I had built cartoon sound effects into the music (a squeaky balloon noise as I grappled with my bra, a ‘boing’ as my bra came loose), and that the silhouette was based on Bugs Bunny dressed as a woman (ruffles, fitted skirt with flounce), and I had a Frankenstein as well.  I had taken the concept of The Bride and put a big cartoony spin on it, so I knew there was no overlap except a love of Elsa Lanchester and a towering wig*.

And, sadly, we’ve had out and out thieves in our midst, performers who thought that they could steal another person’s act.  We had one here in LA.  Her defense was that she did those copycat acts in a strip bar, so that made it OK.  It is never OK to steal.  

But how can you protect yourself from retreading someone else’s ground, as well as not being copied?  I wish I had an easy answer on this.  

My first recommendation involves what is known in the record industry as going for the “deep cuts”.  Sometimes our music is too nail on the head.  It’s one of the reasons I hate Christmas shows:  you’re already in your Leg Avenue Santa suit, do you need to be dancing to Christmas music?  I’m a big fan of entrance music—here’s 32 counts of the theme song, then it’s going to segue into a song that is going to be something I can sing my teeth into.  Conversely, if you are going to perform to something common, like “At Last”, you can’t get mad if other people do it.

Research can go a long way.  The best way to know what is going on in your community is by going to shows and being familiar with the performers around you.  If there is a hardcore nerd performer, you can bet they are going to jump on Princess Leia/Catwoman/Steampunk.   Or that your local vintage vamp is going to dance to “Fever”.  You can also search google and youtube; You will not find every act youtube, but you may find photos on Facebook.  I myself have very little footage on line (because I don’t have great professional video), but I do have my repertoire on my website, listing every act I do, the songs, length, a brief description of the act and the costume, and a still photo.  Don’t hesitate to get on the yahoo groups or Facebook and asking “Who does a (theme/song/character) act?”  It’s always better to know before you order that $500 custom corset.  

Also, it is up to producers to inform dancers when there is an overlap.  For example, Dancer A pitched me a crazy cat lady act, but I knew that Dancer B was working on one.  As a producer, I am responsible for keeping track of acts from both my cast and my students, as well as being involved in the scene since 2001, I feel it is my duty to let people know when they are treading similar ground.  

When I was in film school, I was told by my film professor: “Don’t make films about guns, don’t make films about drugs, and for God’s sake stay out the damned cemetery.”  Was he trying to crush my artistic freedom?  No, he was giving me shorthand that every mother-loving film student before me has made those films and that there was no way for me to know that.  Did I come up with something more creative?  Yes.  The word “No” is an obstacle, a hurdle, but is not a brick wall.  Because if you are passionate about the subject, then you will continue to push the artistic process in order to bring your act to life.  If “No” stops you, then maybe you weren’t passionate about the subject.  

What if you find someone who is doing something similar (same song, theme, character) to what you want to do?  Contact them.  Open a line of discussion.  They could tell you to take a long walk off a short pier.  They may say it was a one-off and will never do the act again.  Upon talking, they may agree that the acts are very different.  But the only way to find that out is to ask.  And you have to respect whatever they tell you.  

Because the bottom line is, how would you feel if someone was doing your act?  

*This was the act I took first-runner up at Miss Exotic World (now Burlesque Hall of Fame) in 2004.  You can see the debut performance on youtube at http://tinyurl.com/PennyBride

(The following is an oldie but I goodie, and I wanted to bring it here in my little blossoming burlesque blog with my other essays. Enjoy!)

OK, I’m going to say this first, do not use:

Kitten, Kitty, Vixen, Honey, Von, Lux or Deluxe, Lola, de Ville, Violette, Scarlette, Pinky, Femme or Belle.

Why, you may ask?  Because these names have been taken a million times over!   Seriously, this is like calling yourself Jennifer.  In fact, you might as well use Jennifer, as that will be unique to the burlesque community.

And, nothing is more shattering than coming to perform and having an audience member say “Oh, I thought you were that other gal!”

And, honestly, you don’t need to tread the same ground; you should want to have your own, individual personality.  

‘Porn Name’
This has always been the tried and true: the name of your pet and the first street you lived on.  (In my case it would be Natasha Tacoma.)

Makes and Models of Cars
Sure, de Ville is out of the running (since you’d never want to be compared to the legendary Kitten de Ville), but look at all these choices:  Continental, Coupe, SuperSport, Zephyr, Valiant, Corvair, Mustang, Nova, Futura, Mercury, Rocket 88, Metropolitan, Citrone, Fiat.

Cocktails and Booze
Yes, there are names besides Martini:, Campari, Negroni, Gin Fizz, Dubonet, etc.  Did you know there is a cocktail called Poussé Café?  How about a play on the name Frenet Branca, a digestif from the late 1800’s.

Gemstones
Pearl, Ruby, Emerald, Opal, Garnet, Toapz…you get the idea.

Slang
These are slang for ‘woman’:  Baby, Bearcat, Skirt, Hoofer, Broad, Bimbo, Chassis, Dame, Doll, Dollybird, Gold-Digger, Moll, Twist…

Words in another language
Star in French is etoile; fire in Spanish is fuego.  There are several websites that offer basic word translation when googled.   Do be sure that you are pronouncing it properly!

Get a Drag Queen to Name You!
Those gals have such great names like Amanda Wreckinwith,  Sugar Placebo, Chinchilla Carcoat or Maria Von Mantrapp.

Watch Old Movies, Read Books!
Do you know there is a Lolita Haze and Dolores Haze?  Know where those came from?  That’s the name of the girl in LOLITA.  
What about Eve Harrington, the conniving ingénue in ALL ABOUT EVE?  Or better yet, Bettie Davis’ character in that film, Margot Channing?  
Constance Chatterly  (LADY CHATTERLY’S LOVER), Lady de Winter (THE THREE MUSKETEERS), Kid Twist (THE STING) are possibilities!

Still Stuck?

Well, here are some names I’ve come up with:

April May June—“The Girl for Every Day!” 
Danielle Boom!—“Queen of the Wild Frontier”
Mitzi Tov—“Look at Those Blessings!” 
Delta Dawn  (This is a song from the 70’s)
Lady Mustache (Good for gender bender performer)
Dutch Courage  (this is slang for liquid courage, aka booze)
Dieter Von Cockenstien  (well, OK, that speaks for itself)
Oodles O’Quim  (thank you comic-book author Alan Moore, from the sequel to graphic novel THE LEAGUE OF EXTRAORDINARY GENTLEMEN, BLACK DOSSIER.)
Tia Juana Hooker aka TJ Hooker
Cutty Sark  (a clipper ship and a brand of Scotch)
Poussé Café  (a fancy cocktail made up several different liquers)
Duke L’Orange  (maybe best for a male performer…)
Giggles O’Shaunessey
Knockers McGee
Sally Funbags
Miranda Warning (or Miranda Rights)
(If you take any of these names, please let me know ASAP, as I’ll want to remove them from the list.)

Lastly:

Any name you pick you should Google the name followed by the word burlesque.  If it pops up, you should keep looking!

If it doesn’t, you should join the Miss Exotic World yahoo group and introduce yourself “Hi, I am So-N-So from (your town here) and I am a burlesque performer!”  

I hope this helps!

Since it’s New Year’s Resolution Time, I want to talk about the idea of being in shape.

As every dancer/athlete/actor can tell you, our bodies are our instruments, our canvases to portray our art.  In this case, it’s a healthy mix of humor, glamor, sex and dance.  Yes, we use choreography, costuming, make-up, music, but all of those things are just that—things.  (Actually, I think I just described the floor of our teenage bedroom)  Unless there is a moving, breathing body to support all of those fabulous storytelling elements, it’s just a mannequin in the window of Bergdorf Goodman.  Yes, we have good fortune to be performing in a populist art form, where body type isn’t necessarily dependent on your performance (re: ballerinas), but I don’t think we should toss out the idea of being in shape.  Ah, “in shape”.  What does that even mean?  I’m not talking about having a 6-pack; I am talking about the concept of being able to perform without being out of breath.

Now, I hate the gym.  Hate it. They smell, are littered with TVs, and are lit with fluorescent lighting.  (And to quote Lola Pistola of Viva Va Voom Brrr-lesque in Alaska, “Fluorescent lighting is the fucking enemy.”)  Not a fan of yoga, either.  I’m not very spiritual.  In fact, what’s the opposite of spiritual?  Yeah, until someone teaches a punk rock yoga class, not my thing.  Running?  Ha!  Not with these 30Ds and my bum hip and knee from a car accident, and the ever-present shin splints.  Pilates—I simply adore Pilates!  I was a junky, taking 2 privates and a group class a week.  And, like a junky, I did it until I ran out of money.  Cabaret-style belly dance class is my favorite because I get to wear hair flowers and bracelets and shimmy belts.  Afro-Brazilian countered everything I had worked at in Pilates and Belly Dance, as Afro-Brazilian is very low and earthy, whereas I had worked for years with belly dance and Pilates to be very uplifted.  However, I was able to slide into beginner ballet because of Pilates and belly dance and all that good dance posture.

Here’s the thing:  I didn’t know I didn’t like or dislike any of these things until I tried them.  Here’s another thing:  I took at least one thing away from each of these—whether I liked them or not.  In fact, I was able to develop my own 20 minute workout that I try to do the first thing every morning*.  It involves stretching, assorted sit-ups and crunches, push-ups, downward dog, shoulder rolls, relevés and pliés.  And that works for me.

And that’s something only you can discover.  What works for you.  Because there is no point in doing something you hate, when you could be doing something you love.

So here are a few tips I can recommend for staying in shape:

Good posture:  Can’t stress this enough!  No point in having a $400 costume if it looks like it’s dressing a sack of potatoes.  Spine straight, tailbone tucked ever so slightly, shoulders back and down, head up. You’ll notice to maintain this, you’ll have to support yourself with your core.  Added bonus!  You’re working your core.

  @font-face { font-family: “Arial”; }p.MsoNormal, li.MsoNormal, div.MsoNormal { margin: 0in 0in 0.0001pt; font-size: 12pt; font-family: Times; }div.Section1 { page: Section1; } Make time:  As we are all struggling through day-jobs, performing, family, etc., this can get tricky.  For some, like myself, it’s gotta be first thing in the am; for some, immediately after work.  I treat staying in shape as part of my burlesque act, just as I would make time to make a new costume, or give myself enough time to put on make-up.

Walk:  Can’t run, at least walk.    Park a block away, take the stairs, enter though the opposite end of the mall.  And give yourself enough time.

Warm-up, then stretch, work out, then stretch:  Back in the day, we were supposed to stretch, then exercise.  But they realized that you’d be trying to stretch out cold muscles.  So be sure to warm your muscles first. Stretch those muscles a little, work out, and stretch again to gain flexibility. 

Dance:  I can’t preach enough about taking dance classes (what—stay in shape AND get better at burlesque?), but barring that, just dance around in your living room. Or, grab a pal and go dancing—just watch the booze intake or you could be ruining all your efforts.@font-face { font-family: “Arial”; }p.MsoNormal, li.MsoNormal, div.MsoNormal { margin: 0in 0in 0.0001pt; font-size: 12pt; font-family: Times; }div.Section1 { page: Section1; }  If you are part of a troupe that does a regular craft night, make sure to get everybody up and dance for a few songs in the middle of rhinestoning. 

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Rehearse:  If you are gigging all the time, you are rehearsing all the time.  Hooray!  But even if you don’t have a gig for a while, go ahead and rehearse.  Pick and act or three from your repertoire and do them 3 or 4 times each.  This has the added bonus of keeping your choreography fresh in case you get a last minute booking.

Let me also toss this out there:  As an over-40 dancer, my weight fluctuates wildly.  Where the losing of 5 lbs wasn’t a big deal, is now a big concern, taking much more than my usual 20 minute workout.  I recently had lunch with a few over-50 dancers, who said “it gets worse”.  Better to have the habit of working out ingrained in you system.

One last thing, we often talk about burlesque loving all body types, but you can’t override your own sense of self.  If you look at your pictures and footage and think “ugh!” only you can change that.  You have to love yourself first, before you can convince an audience to love you.

*Any call time before 6am does not include me working out.  Heck, it doesn’t include me showering either.

This blog entry is coming, in part, from two articles written recently about burlesque. The first is the State of the (Burlesque) Union Address from this years’ BurlyCon, as given by Miss Astrid, producer of the long-running Va Va Voom Room (LA, NY, SF), Velvet Hammer alum, and em cee for, among other events, the annual Burlesque Hall of Fame pageant.
http://www.21stcenturyburlesque.com/miss-astrid-state-of-the-union-address/

And the other is a tiered system proposed by Chicago Impresario Red Hot Annie of Vaudezilla Productions, producer of the Windy City Burlesque Fest, to determine the levels of performers and their skill sets, and subsequent rates of pay.
http://redhotannie.livejournal.com/739150.html

These two articles have opened a conversation about what determines a “professional” burlesque dancer versus a “hobbyist”. And it has very little to do with money.

Some people have taken issue with the word “hobbyist”. Perhaps “amateur” is the better choice. But no matter the word, we should be looking at the overriding characteristic that defines a “non-professional” versus a “professional”. In my long and varied career as a burlesque dancer, I have seen the same performer sew one strand of beaded fringe on her bra in the dressing room before the show and call that a ‘costume’, witness another barge into the dressing room and announce to any and all how she didn’t rehearse her act since she performed it four months ago, another sported hairy armpits in front of an audience of 1200 people. (PS—if you don’t shave for 1200 people, when do you shave?)

I would hope the previous statements would make you all shudder and genuinely feel sorry for the audience that had to sit through those performances. I would hope, you are not reading this and saying “So I didn’t rehearse—I had a late shift” or “I didn’t have time to add any rhinestones” or “they’ll never see my hairy legs through the fishnets”. Because when it comes down to it, the audience doesn’t care if you had a final, worked a late shift, or had to help Tommy with his science project. They entered in to a contract with you—they paid you to provide quality entertainment. That quality, by the way, is not based on your pay scale, the size of the show, or the price of the cover. And that’s the first definition of a “professional” is someone who performs for 12 people with the same quality and energy as 100 people.

That level of care goes back to the very inception of constructing a burlesque act. Let me ask you a question: How fully realized do you think you can make a “professional” act in two weeks? Conceivably, if you were an accomplished dancer and spent hours studying one or more dance disciplines, you’d have the skills to build a choreography. If you had taken sewing classes, you could easily construct and embellish the costume that helps tell the story of your act. If you were accomplished at make-up and hair, you could devise a visage for your performance. If you had performance chops from years of performing, you’d have the ability to know how to anticipate the audience’s reaction. Add into those great many “ifs” the rest of your life—like earning a living, spending time with loved ones, eating, sleeping, and rehearsing—not too mention the financial resources available to fund a new act—and it looks to me like it would take longer than two weeks to make an act worth seeing. Second definition of “professional” is someone who spends the time collecting the skills needed to continue doing their art.

But just being an amazing performer is only part of you “job” as a burlesque dancer. Do you have a facebook page with some snapshots? Or a website with your own url, with expert photos and video? Are you as interested as gathering a fan base as buying body glitter? Are you tweeting about your next appearance? Do you even have a Twitter account? If not, why not? Aren’t you proud of the work you are putting into your performance? Psyched to promote the shows you star in? A “professional” understands that tickets need to be sold.

Whew! With all that, it sounds like a full time job!

Well, it is.

And that is the definition of a “professional”.

This was originally written by request of Diane Nagael for ZELDA MAGAZINE.  I was reminded of this today, Veterans Day, after a story on the Bonus Army on NPR:

If movies of the early 1930’s were a fantasy, an escape, consider the following lyrics: 

 We never see headlines
about the bread lines today,
And when we see the landlord
we can look that guy right in the eye

Granted, these lyrics are being sung by a Ginger Rogers, and 54 chorus girls, decked out in 54,000 silver coins in costumes designed by the underrated Orry- Kelly, singing about a carefree time of ample money.  But the fantasy the lyrics are presenting are no more glorious than the ability to walk pass the landlord without reproach.  And then, the fantasy is broken.  Ginger and the chorus girls are part of a show that is being closed for lack of funds.  And certainly at this point, lack of funds was not new to anyone in the country at that point.

And thus is the opening GOLD DIGGERS OF 1933.

Filmed at the height of the Depression, GOLD DIGGERS OF 1933 is based on the popular Avery Hopwood play, THE GOLD DIGGERS from 1919.  The plot is a lighthearted farce about the rather new word (although age-old popular trend) of young women pursuing wealthy men:

“The story follows innocent and demure chorus girl Violet Dayne who has fallen in love with the well-to-do Wally Lee. Unfortunately, Wally’s uncle Stephen disapproves of the match so Violet turns to her friend, mentor, and fellow chorus girl Jerry Lamar for help. When Stephen arrives to save his young nephew from the machinations of the girls, he mistakes Jerry for Violet. Using a bit of reverse psychology, Jerry attempts to shock him, hoping to have him relent when he meets the real Violet, only to have it backfire when Stephen falls for her. When Jerry confesses the deception, Stephen storms out. In the end, however, love and happiness prevail for both Violet and Jerry.”

With it’s run of performances over the course of 1919 and 1920, it was no wonder that Hollywood came a-callin’.  Three times in fact:  the play was first filmed as THE GOLD DIGGERS in 1923 as a silent film, THE GOLD DIGGERS OF BROADWAY in 1928, and finally as THE GOLD DIGGERS OF 1933.

In fact, although the original play is about chorus girls, THE GOLD DIGGERS OF BROADWAY is the first version to incorporate musical elements into the structure of the story. It is the second all-color, all talking feature film and became the top grossing film of all time in 1929 and held this record until 1939.  It is no wonder that Warner Brothers, who already had license to the property, was willing to give it another go as the structure for a new film.  Hot on the heels of the success of 42^nd STREET, Warner Brothers was looking for another boffo box office.  In the heyday of Hollywood, the studios did not make traditional sequels, but instead took the same creative team and made a new film.

The original material, a frothy delight of flappers and fun, was now facing the cold, hard depression as it’s backdrop.    And that brings us to Ginger and the gals getting shut down by creditors at the start of the film.  The cast is filled with a who’s-who of musical theater:  Dick Powell, Joan Blondell, Ginger Rogers and Ruby Keeler, in a plot that stays true to the original text.

There are five innovative musical sequences in the film by Busby Berkeley, who integrated the camera into the chorography by hanging the camera directly over the dancers , bringing a crane into the set, holding the camera on it’s side—making these dance sequences live outside of the frame or traditional proscenium view.  Berkeley even used the close-up as a way to introduce the individual chorus girls on camera.  Known as his “Parade of Faces”, Berkeley’s instinct was to highlight each of the pretty chorines.

Berkeley served as a field artillery lieutenant during World War 1, and after the cease fire, designed parade drills, as well as served as an aerial observer with the Air Corps, giving him a distinct view of the world from overhead.  Because Berkeley served, is it any wonder that he was moved by the Bonus Army’s march on Washington, D.C. in May of 1932 to create the musical sequence that ends the film “Remember My Forgotten Man”.

Comprised of WW1 vets and their families, the Bonus Army was seeking to have paid service certificates that would not mature for 20 years, in an effort to stave off the effects of the Depression.  The veterans, who had to prove they had been honorably discharged, made a temporary home in a swampy marsh area across from the Anacostia River.  Although their camps were scavenged from trash, the camp was laid out with streets, had their own sanitation facilities, and the veterans marched in formation everyday.  Hoover soon ordered the camps destroyed, and General Douglas MacArthur and Major George Patton charged the veterans with the 3^rd Calvary (armed with bayonets) and no less than 6 battle tanks.  Adamsite gas, an arsenic based gas, was lobbed into the crowd.  After the majority of the veterans fled to the main part of their camp, Hoover called off the attack.  But General MacArthur ignored the order and continued attacking what he believed to be Communists.  Although there is no accurate count, hundreds of veterans and women and children were injured, several were killed.

“Remember My Forgotten Man” starts with Ginger Rogers in a vulgar street walker costume.  A bum walks by smoking the end of a cigarette, Ginger grabs his arms to light her own cigarette, and then puts the new cigarette in his mouth and takes his own stub to smoke.  He is taken aback at this act of kindness.  As she sings, one can feel that had her man not be sent off to fight the war (and begging the question of where he is now—dead?  Gone?),  she would not be  a streetwalker.  She later prevents another veteran from being beaten by a cop for loitering.  Then comes the marching montage:  boys marching off to war, soldiers marching in the rain, injured soldiers wearily marching, and veterans marching down breadlines.  Berkeley now returns to the “Parade of Faces”, but they are not the fantasy chorus girls of a musical fantasy, but the faces of the veterans hardened from war and hunger. 

Upon completion, Jack Warner replaced the original ‘happy ending’ of “Pettin’ in the Park” with “Remember My Forgotten Man”, and much like GOLD DIGGERS OF 1933 started, a stark reminder of the troubles of the average American.

Let’s all start with a little prayer that every burlesque producer says the night of their show:

A BURLESQUE PRODUCER’S PRAYER
Please do not let it rain, snow, subway strike or freeway close due to police activity.

Please let me sell at least enough tickets to cover the cast, the staff, the fliers, the extra gloves I had to buy for the chorus.
Please do not let the venue double book.
Please let the audience fall in love.
Please let the em cee win out over the heckler.
Please let the curtain work.
Please let the venue sell enough liquor to keep the owners happy; please let the venue not have it’s liquor license pulled, change management or close unexpectedly.
Please let my performers be at the top of their game.
And please let me have the chance to do it all over again next week/month.

The reasons to produce burlesque are as varied as one can expect: The opportunity fell in your lap, there’s no other show like it, there was no show in your city/neighborhood. But the one thing that should be common to all these reasons is that you have a passion for live theater and you want to showcase other talented people. If you are thinking about producing a show as a fast track to getting stage time for yourself, you should think again. Because once the show is rolling, it will not be about you. It will be about your other performers feeling welcome and taken care of, knowing that if they have a problem, you can help them solve it, from everything to helping with an elaborate prop set-up, to lacing a corset, to letting someone paw through your make-up bag for spirit gum. I have on more than one occasion had to drop my own act to deal with a problem during the show.

Because, whether you know it or not, if there is a problem with the show, it’s ALL your problem. Your Em Cee got a flat tire on the way to the venue? That’s your problem. Your first paying audience member paid with a $100 bill and wiped out your change? That’s your problem. Club double booked the night? Doorgirl is sick? The CD player at the club is broke? Your problem, your problem, your problem.

Producing a show means loving it, even when it sucks. And it’s gonna suck.

Let me first say that burlesque is the most expensive form of live theater to produce. This is because each act ranges roughly from 3 minutes to 10 minutes per performer. Stand-up comedians do 10 to 15 minutes, bands will play 45 minutes a set, and a play is 90 minutes to 2 hours. By default, producing a 90 minute burlesque means you are going to need a lot more performers than any of the other shows I listed. Also, burlesque dancers (and rightfully so) have put it in their heads that they deserved to get paid. Can you think of any other group of live performers where they are guaranteed payment? A band may have to split a paltry amount amongst 5 band members. And theater actors? Many of them have to pay into an acting troupe to support the production. Add into the other costs and staff of any show (stage manager, pick-up artist, em cee, other variety acts, sound and security, and lastly, fliers), it can easily add up to a $500-$1000 night, and that doesn’t include any cost related to the venue.

As to venues, there are several ways to be booked in a venue. The Gold Standard is of course to have a club pay for the entire cost of the show and it’s advertising. I find in LA, this is rare, since there are so many performers looking for the chance to perform, clubs don’t have to put any money out of their own pocket to get talent to their club. From there you could pay a room rental, split the admissions off the door with the club, the club can take the bar sales and you keep the door, or the club can give you a percentage of the bar sales. (I find this last one to be the best of all worlds.)

I have worked at clubs that were “too cool” to have a sign on the building (which, BTW, how does one find live entertainment without a sign?), hadn’t updated their website, and generally looked at my show like I was bothering them to go out and hustle a booze-consuming audience into their business. Conversely, I have seen show producers be completely baffled as to why they no longer have a show when their average audience was 30 people—it goes both ways.

Let’s talk about the logistics of burlesque venues. I too often have seen burlesque (and performed burlesque, and produced burlesque) in clubs that were in no way suited for burlesque. You are going to need 4 things to produce a burlesque show: performance space, sound system, dressing room, lights. I say ‘performance space’ because that doesn’t necessarily have to be a stage, but any clear area that you can dance in that has decent sightlines for the audience. This can be the floor, the VIP section of the bar, even the bar itself. Being Five Foot Somethin’ I am keenly aware that if I am producing at a club with a low stage, no one but the first 2 rows will see anyone doing floor work. At my current club, the ceiling on the stage is low and can not accommodate my tallest dancer at full extension with her fans. You need a sound system to play the music for your dancers and have a mic for your em cee, and the sound system needs to be heard throughout the bar (as well as someone to hit play and stop—let alone if you are featuring live music). I can’t stress the importance of a dressing room that is not the public toilet. It needs to be private (office, stockroom, etc.), it should have a mirror and 1 coat hook to hang garment bags. (You can easily cart around those mirrors they sell for the back of a dorm room door, as well as hooks that slip over the top of a door.) And lastly, you need lights. Because you need to direct the focus of the audience to where you are performing. Also, these lights should never be red ot any other strong party color (so as to wash the color out of your costume), but should be soft amber or pink. But if you are looking for a club, see if they have added bonuses like a curtain, an on-staff sound mixer, parking or close to public trans, a marquee, the ability to promote your show on their website and through their e-mail list. Too many people rush into bad business deals in an effort to get their show off the ground, when there is no point in starting a show that will cost you money/time/effort because the venue is completely wrong.

Now, what kind of audience should you expect? Well, burlesque as a form of entertainment is still an unknown in this country. Ask any stranger on the street and they could no more tell you what burlesque is or what they will see at a burlesque show. We are referencing a form of theater that last saw it’s hey-day in the 50’s. And this art form may not be everyone’s cup of tea; just because we a comfortable with our own sexuality on display may not mean everyone is comfortable watching it. (We do live in America—the place where, in 2002, Attorney General John Ashcroft put drapes over the statue of Blind Justice because her breasts were showing.) Already, we have reduced a potential large audience down to open-minded individuals, who are comfortable going to bars, and have the ability to go to a show that may start at 10pm on a school night. (You may not want to do a Tuesday night show.) Let’s not forget if there is any other competition going on that night for your audience (art opening, concert, roller derby).

I also want to add that there is a certain amount of integrity you will need to maintain if you are coming late to the game in a town with other burlesque shows. Sorry, but probably the other shows have nailed the more common themes like sci-fi, classic and USO. That does not give you license to do the same themes. Heck, that doesn’t even give you license to “change it 10% and make it your own”. (As the producer of the longest-running sci-fi show in both LA and San Diego, I was quite dismayed to see any number of producers jump on that band wagon.) Oh, but you really wanted to do a Sherlock Homes show and that other troupe has already done one. Well, and pardon me for being blunt, suck it! We’re burlesque dancers and we should be creative as all get out—come up with something different! Mash something up, ike my back-to-school/sploshing show, FOOD FIGHT. Or better yet, write something new!

Fianlly, I really want to talk about the importance of working with professionals.

When I say professionals, I mean performers who understand that they are being paid to perform in a show that must sell tickets and that they are rehearsed, their costume is completed by show time, they can apply make-up and do their hair and wigs, they have a temperament that fits with the other performers and they are proud and supportive to be in the show. Whew—that’s a mouthful! But every part of that needs to be taken in consideration. In the past, I booked everyone for my show, as during the course of it’s 6 year (and going) run, I have realized that there are really just 20 or so people I want to represent me and the show because they are talented, easy-going, share my sick sense of humor, can roll with any punch that gets thrown at us and are genuinely proud to be in the show.

I have had to let go of people I genuinely liked as people, but did not love as performers, and this has happened to every burlesque producer. I’ve seen producers treat their shows like the 2nd grade play, where everyone gets a part. And that’s fine for second grade. But these are paying customers and paying gigs. If my troupe is bringing me a new act, I ask that they show it to me during rehearsals. I rarely put anything on stage I haven’t seen first (either during rehearsals or tape from another show). There is no excuse to have two fans dances back to back, or three pink costumes on the same show, or worst of all, having two dancers performing to the same song! Eeek! When I see that on a show, I just cringe. Where was the producer when they were putting together the line-up?

Because in the end, your name goes on each and every show. Sure, as a producer you may not have had any part in a performer’s individual act, but it’s your decision to give them stage time, and it’s your reputation that will tarnish if they show up with fringe falling off their panties and uncovered leg bruises. You are asking an audience to pay good money (and all money in these economic times are good money) to see the show you curated. And that should never be taken lightly.

I will be the first to admit that I have not been a fan of classic burlesque. When I say classic I mean boas, corsets, no shimmying, just a lot of strutting and stripping and a sometimes stage littered with all manner of set dressing.  Classic burlesque that references the clips of Lili St. Cyr, Tempest Storm and Bettie Page that you could find on burlesque compilation DVDs from Something Weird Video. 

I had told myself that since I was bored watching it, it must be boring to do. 

And then, something changed my mind. 

A few years back, I saw Catherine D’Lish perform at a small event at Koko De Mer, a high-end lingerie shop here in LA.  Now, I had seen Catherine a dozen times before and had considered her one of the few classic performers I actually enjoyed.  I have never been bored watching Catherine, and this was no exception, as she positively peeled off her well-tailored costume while engaging the audience the whole time.  What was Catherine’s appeal?  On the surface, I could describe her act as anyone’s classic act (glove peels, stocking work), but what spark had she found to bring it to life? 

This moment also coincided with research I was doing about the greats of burlesque.  Why did Lili St. Cyr and Gypsy Rose Lee have both longevity and greater success in their careers than that of  Georgia Sothern and Dixie Evans?  Why did Lili and Gypsy capture the hearts and history of burlesque, where Georgia and Dixie did not?  Weren’t they all considered “classic” performers, yet why did neo-classic burlesque look more like the elegant set pieces of St. Cyr, not the hot-hot-hot of Sothern?  And why does neo-burlesque involve so many corsets, none to be seen in the classic headshots from the time period?

Part of my thesis is that as downtown burlesque houses were being shut down in the 30’s in New York and burlesque itself began migrating first into speakeasies and then to nightclubs, the manner of acts changed.  Prior to LaGuardia’s shut down of burlesque, Minksy’s could have Georgia Sothern  working hot (without panties) and risk being raided without any great consequence.  Burlesque was a working man’s entertainment, far more debased than vaudeville.  In the swank post-war nightclubs, Lili St. Cyr’s balletic scenarios removed the aggressive sexuality so they could be enjoyed by all who came the to clubs.  This idea was supported by my grandmother, Penny Starr, Sr.  She told me that the higher up she went on the circuit, from carnival to nightclubs, the less she had to take off.  Often she worked “classy” parties, events for doctors and lawyers and their wives, where she didn’t have to go down to pasties. 

You might say that I am talking about two dancers from two different time periods, so let’s compare and contrast contemporaries Lili St. Cyr with Dixie Evans, by looking at their two most famous acts, Lili St. Cyr’s bathtub act and Dixie’s Marilyn Monroe/casting couch.  Lili is a trained dancer (ballet), she is tall, striking, graceful and, dare I say, almost cold.  For her bathtub act, she has a full boudoir with tub and bubble machine, as well as a maid.  She comes in dressed in a gown, strips with the aid of a maid, covers with a towel, slips into the tub, slips out of the tub and back into a towel, then back into lingerie.  She mostly touches herself as part of the experience of washing her body.  Dixie comes on wild and hot dressed as Marilyn Monroe.  She strips out of a jacket and skirt, all glitter with a vulgar slit up the side and the kind of stole a woman only gets as a present from a man (code for being sexually loose).   She shakes her tits at the director’s chair marked “producer” (as if to taunt the producer who is not visible), peels off her stockings on the casting couch, cooch to the camera, strips down to nude colored nets and g-string and grinds the couch.  Dixie makes contact with all parts of her body.

Lili moves like a ballet dancer; Dixie, a stripper.  Lili makes no reference to pop culture; Dixie’s persona as the “Marilyn Monroe of Burlesque” lived, and died, with Marilyn.  In essence, Lili is a class act, Dixie is visceral.  (As you can see, I never categorized Kitten de Ville as a classic burlesque performer because her fiery shimmying, her bump and grind, the fact that she looked like as much fun as I was having watching her was never going to be as much fun as she herself was having onstage.)

Could I create a classic act that had the elements of burlesque I loved (dance technique, shimmies, being dirty) with the elements I did not respond to (repetitive movement, boas)?

For you see, I had begun to see the value of having a classic number.  It has commercial appeal.  When someone says “clown”, you think big shoes and red nose, and “belly dancer” you think coin belt and finger cymbals; by default when being booked for a private party as a “burlesque dancer”, people expect sequin gowns, evening gloves and boas.  It requires no elaborate set-up or clean-up, no props.  It is also unreasonable to ask for $200 for a private party when you are only providing 3-5 minutes of entertainment (the length of an average act), versus doing a classic set of 2-3 songs in one act.  If you have a classic number, it can slot into any non-themed show.  If you have good classic techniques and a classic costume, you can dance to any live band, slowing down or speeding up the tempo as needed. 

Lastly, classic burlesque is the purest of the art form.  There are no gimmicks to hide behind, no character to act as a mask, no props to play with, in the end it is up to you and your body to entertain, generally doing movements slower than most performers feel comfortable moving at for fear of boring both the audience and themselves. 

And what I also discovered is this is the most fearful to a lot of performers, myself included.  I had always known that if I were bored on stage, I would certainly bore my audience.  How could one gal stripping out of the same style of costume in the same way any classic performer moves be interesting to me?  Me who has performed as the Golden Calf, Isadora Duncun, Lady Hitler, someone who peels off her skin even?  Where could I introduce my personality into that stale and stolid formula?

So I decided to try to analyze the markers of classic burlesque to see where I could deviate and make the act something I could still sink my teeth in.  I broke classic down into the following elements:

High Glamour
Connection with the Audience
Graceful, Languid Movement
Non-Comedic/Non-Character Driven
Traditional Jazz Music
Gown and Glove
Two Songs in Length

Now, using this guide brought up some interesting points about the elements of classic.  Venus de Mille’s Minnie the Moocher act, where Venus comes out in gown and glove, and ends up dressed as Minnie Mouse, fits all of the above except Non-Comedic/Non-Character Driven.  It’s also only one song, but a long version at that.  Or what about La Cholita’s award-winning act from Viva Las Vegas?  It was not to traditional jazz, and certainly has it’s fair amount of ass shakin’, but fit every other category.  And certainly I’d be remiss if I didn’t mention Lux LaCroix’s “Going Back to Cali” act, where she does wear a gown and corset, but the music is “classic” hip-hop.

I came to the realization that you can drop any two of the above elements and still maintain a classic feel EXCEPT High Glamour and Connection With The Audience.  Because what both those things accomplish is something that Gypsy and Lili understood—that to have a greater appeal, you need to accepted by all audiences. Classic can be presented to an uninitiated audience, usually couples, without being threatening sexually.  I find that High Glamour will often disarm any women in the room who have come with a predisposed notion that burlesque is stripping.*  It’s a visual shorthand to the crowd that what they are going to see harkens back to something from last century (for who in this day and age wears boas and evening gloves?).  Making a connection with an audience cues them in that it is indeed OK to watch you doing this mild sexual act, that if you are laughing and having fun, they can too. 

And that is ultimately what I found in Catherine D’Lish was the spark.  She engaged the audience the whole time.  She was here for us.  I found that so many other performers think that moving slow means to turn their attention inward and excluding the audience; with Catherine, she was both enjoying her own movement as well as being open to letting us enjoy her as well.

Once I had broke down the elements of classic, I realized I wasn’t that far off from working classic elements into various acts.  I was already teaching how to take a move for 8 counts and slow it down to 32 counts.  I didn’t have a gown, but from my James Bond act, I did have a tux that I was using in the same capacity.  And after 7 years of performing, I had the courage to say “this body can be entertaining” without a character to hide behind.

I technically did my first classic act for a classic show Red Snapper was producing in 2010.  I still had to be true to who I am as a performer.  I still didn’t have a gown, but I did repurpose my costume from my tribute to my grandmother, all fringe and giant rhinestones.  Since I love performing to music I don’t hear on other stages, I did it to “April in Paris” by Duke Ellington.  And the best part?  It was super fun to just treat every move big and luscious and juicy!  

I am currently working on some new classic acts, but with the Penny twist:  Costuming one in full glam rock mode, with stripper shoes, leg warmers, rhinestoned sunglasses, using 30 year old new wave/punk songs from Joe Jackson and Madness for the other. ’Cause isn’t a 30 year old song “classic” at this point?

*Burlesque is stripping, but burlesque dancers are not necessarily strippers in the sense of costume/choreography/sexual content.  I find that most people who want to reduce burlesque to just it’s stripping elements are people who have never been to a strip club in the first place.  Their ideas about strippers come from movies and TV—a far cry from accuracy!